Little light
by Intergalactic Chocochip Cookie
Summary: Alice's transformation by her doctor and protector... I cried while writing it, but it's still nice... Enjoy!


**Little light**

Time was up. He would be back, and soon. The moment I'd met his eyes I knew I would lose her, one way or another. I went to her cell to protect her from him, at least for this night, and tried to think what I would do next. I couldn't risk her, I could not put her in the smallest danger. Therefore, I could not leave her there, or she would surely die. The idea of her inert body was so horrifying I wasn't able to even think of it. _There must be something, _I told myself._ Something to keep her safe, to make her strong, to save her, to..._ I stopped. I knew exactly what that was.

Yet this new option was somehow more terrible. I hated this life, so how could I condemn someone to that fate? And not just anyone, but the person I loved and cared for most in the world; better said, the _only_ person I loved and cared for in the world. I had three options: first, to leave everything as it was and pray for him to never appear again. But I had seen in his expression that he was a hunter, he would not rest until he got what he wanted. Not doing anything meant sending her to death. So this plan was eliminated. Second: to take her away, take her with me, and try to protect her. But as long as she stayed human she would be frail, exposed, we would be in constant fear. Besides, she might attract more of us with her blueberry-and-jasmine perfume. As if to confirm it, a soft current of air hit me with her scent; the flames that burned my throat told me this wasn't a good idea, either.

And there was the third option, this cruel option: transform her, make her immortal. Steal her life and turn her into a monster, a damned creature. It meant an eternal existence full of pain, from the very moment the venom started running through her veins, a never-ending pain. How could I make her suffer? I loved her so much...

But I just couldn't lose her. How would I go on without this little light that shone alone in my darkness? How would I make it through a day without seeing her sweet, childlike eyes? Would I survive if I didn't have someone to sing to, to play with, someone to love?

_Shut up, you selfish! _said a voice in my head. _You would do it because you don't want her to suffer, or because _you_ don't want to suffer? Will _your_ wishes rule _her_ life?_ No, not my wishes, but a need, an overwhelming need. I just had to keep her by my side. I approached her. She had sunk back to sleep, completely oblivious to the darkness hovering over her. The moonlight gave her face a magical gleam, the paleness shone as if the light were inside her. With her snow-like skin and that amazing, surreal beauty, she already looked like one of us, like a vampire. "People's looks tend to get better with the transformation," I whispered to her while I stroked her hair. "But, can you get any prettier?" It was in that second when I knew I wouldn't stay with the doubt. _My wishes, yes! _I told the accusing voice. _This is my little light. I wish her to shine forever._

I took her in my arms. Her eyelids opened a milimeter and she spoke in her soft, marshmallow-like voice. "What... where are you taking me?" "A place where you'll be safe, darling" "Shocks?" she asked, her voice suddenly scared. "Not anymore, sweetheart. Shocks are over forever." "Yes, that's what you want me to believe," she answered. "But tomorrow..." We arrived to the Medications Room. I wanted to spare her as much pain as possible, so I decided to make an experiment. After laying her down on a divan I began searching in the shelves until I found what I wanted. Morphine. I prepared the injection and turned to her. It surprised me to find her greyish blue eyes wide open, no trace of sleep, she was curled up in a ball and looking at me. "This will hurt you a little," I cautioned her. "Whatever," she answered. "I'm always in so much pain..." I gave her the drug and soon she was unconcious again. Then I carried her to the woods that surrounded the asylum. I found a beautiful meadow, with patches of flowers of all colours. The pines and cedars around it would act as a shield, a beautiful shield. I wanted that the first things she saw with her new eyes were the prettiest, almost as pretty as her.

I closed my eyes to gain the courage. "Love give me strenght," I said. I undid the knot of her white gown and left her neck uncovered. I stared at her, part in fear, part in fascination. Then I inclined myself over her and sank my teeth on her throat. Her blood flowed in my mouth, sweeter than anything, the unbelievable, wonderful concentration of her fragance. I drank, for in taking her blood I could taste her beauty, her tenderness, I could feel the daintiness of her movements, the sound of her occasional laughter. I drank and drank, until I heard her heart's beatings slowing, becoming a faint, quiet sound, and I realized I was killing her. _Selfish, selfish! _I repeated to myself. I pulled myself away from her, tried to calm down, and then I took one of her hands. Soft, delicate. Trying very hard not to think, I bit her wrist. I felt the warm liquid again, but this time I didn't taste it. The rest was easier: the other wrist, and both ankles. When I was done I sat beside her, held her hand, and waited for the burning to come.

But it never came. I waited and waited, but she never seemed to notice anything. Her heart was beating, faster and faster, so I knew I had done it all right, yet she gave no signs of feeling the transformation. _The morphine!_ I thought. _It worked!_ She was changing in a pain-free way. Maybe this was not that bad... Suddenly, I found myself imagining how our lives together would be, lives that would never end, lives with a little light to guide their path. Turning her into a vampire had just become the best thing I'd ever done.

For two nights I kept watch over her. During the third day she did feel something, because she stirred from time to time, and an occasional moan escaped her lips. The sensation seemed to get stronger, for the faster her heart beat, the more frequent her movements were, she would twitch slightly, and kept moaning. "It will be fine, it will be over soon," I tried to comfort her I'm so sorry."

And then it all happened very fast. I heard him and saw him at the same time. The hunter. He had gone back and found her cell empty. Still, he was here now. Fury distorsioned his features and, with a growl, he jumped over me. We fought, using all our strenght, he to get to her, I to protect her. The fight went on and on, both of us were strong and had the experience. But then, in an unexpected movement, he launched himself at her. I intercepted his way, shielding her, and only then I realized it had been a trick. Everything was over. _God, help her,_ I thought. _She can't die now. There's nothing in her to interest him._ My last words were for her. _Alice, I love you._


End file.
